Fatherhood with Tonna.
By Chris Nwogu
I think fatherhood has taking a new dimension on this era of high IQ kids.
For me Tonna is a mixture of daring, intelligent and mischief.
Daring in the sense that he tries to stretch and push instructions and frontier to that point that is the limit after which it becomes an offence, often he doesn’t cross it. that means you can only howl as he has not committed an offence. Academically, so far Tonna is more of intelligence than brilliance, questions his teachers more instead of answering questions as such he has teachers who loves him to the heavens and few like the current teacher who seems uncomfortable with him….
Verbally he is genius and very expressive but when it comes to writing, that’s a tug of war.
Tonna is so restless, easily distracted and highly opinionated, he started speaking before 10 months.
About a year ago when my Dad visited and stayed about a month as he undergo medical treatment, having had to stay with the kids since they were on holiday. He has asked one day when I was metting African Papa discipline to Tonna, my Dad has asked, how old is he? I said 2years 3months… My father looked at me and submitted… You have a challenge in your hand. He acts far above his age, yet if you treat him like his age he will over power you and if you treat him as he is you may abuse him or cause him to withdraw so you have to come up with a balance, that is what fatherhood is all about! And I guess I have been up to my toes ever since that revelation often i try to explains things as if to an adult bc he wouldn’t let ago until you have answered clearly to her understanding.
This morning I was home till about 9am so I took my time to bath my kids. As I was applying cream on his body he was being playful, so I said calmly
Tonna pls concentrate you know am going to work. And the following conversation ensued.
Tonna: Daddy, I thought you’re not going to work today. You will stay home with us.
Me: if I don’t go to work how can we take care of you?
Tonna: but mommy has gone and u are still at home
Me: yes, because I have meeting at the ministry by 10am. So I want to go straight from home.
Tonna: OK, but must you go?
Me: yes, I have to, its part of my work naa ( i was already getting nervy as I thought i was going to start explaining what ministry is?)
Tonna: but Daddy….
Me: cut him off…enough! I don’t have time for all these your questions this morning, can’t you see am running late?
Tonna: looked up at me straight and quietly… (I was dressing him up now)
And muttered clearly.
Every day..work, work, work…. And you don’t go to church…you don’t take us to church.
I was hit by the direct calm quietness of his response so I said….
Me: OK am sorry we’ll resume church now.
Tonna: (in a whisper) OK Daddy. (meanwhile we have been going to church intermittently this period and have not being to church for 2 consecutive weeks. So Tonna, from nowhere has extracted a promise from me this morning.
-A promise I must keep.